We're Pro-Choice, Except When We're Not

The ladies over at Feministing.com are in a state of absolute glee. A recent posting included the phrases "Damn Straight!" and "Booya." We can't quite figure out all the hubbub, but they seem to be excited about the following court ruling.

We read the synopsis of the opinion and found that the judges came to a very reasonable conclusion. A law that mandates the distribution of a drug does not seem to impinge anyone's free exercise of religion. The pharmacists are still free to practice a religion that states abortion is a sin all they want.

Should there be a pharmacist that hates Catholics, because his church considers Rome to be the Whore of Babylon, we would not want our political overlords telling us that it is perfectly fine for the hypothetical pharmacist to discriminate on the basis of creed because the pharmacist tries to abuse the first amendment. Therefore, we do not take issue with the court ruling, but there is something flawed in feministing.com's rhetoric.

The post labels a pharmacist's right to refuse to distribute the morning after pill "Anti-Choice" when indeed, invoking this right expands the range of choices available to the pharmacist. A law that requires anyone to do something is the most anti-choice type of legislation. This shows that feministing.com simply does not want the government to take a pro-choice stance, but rather, a pro-abortion stance.

We agree with the ladies over there to some extent on this "right of conscious" nonsence. If a helathcare worker is employed and their superiors order them to distribute the morning after pill, or to prep a paitient for a legal abortion, and said worker refuses, it seems perfectly appropriate for that worker's employment to be terminated without the threat of suit. This viewpoint takes the stance that the government should not intervene in the private going-ons of commerce. Taking this view requires us to apply this view when considering whether the owner of a pharmacy decides whether to stock the morning after pill or not. In our opinion, the most pro-choice stance says the government should not mandate what a private enterprise chooses to sell. A pro-abortion stance threatens fines should a pharmacist not provide the pill.


Feministing recently linked to this article which expressed dissapointment should a man not choose to label himself a feminist, even if he did believe that men and women should be treated equally. If being a male feminist requires knee jerk applause of a government policy because it reaffirms one of your ideals, in this case, your pro-abortion stance, no wonder men do not want this label.

New Monkey Discovered, World a Better Place

Some scientists got together and decided that this adorable critter is,

in fact, a monkey that qualifies as previously undiscovered. You can read all about this scientological breakthrough here.

The announcement says,

"This discovery should serve as a wake-up call that there is still so much to learn from the world's wild places, yet humans continue to threaten these areas with destruction."

As if learning for learning's sake is a worthwhile endeavor. The world is in the middle of a global recession. Tell us how the monkey can enrich the world. If the destruction of this monkey's home provides a human, albeit a Brazilian, a job, so he can feed her family, all the better. We were indifferent to the continued existence of this monkey yesterday, and just because they announce its confirmed existence, we should care about it's continued existence today? We think not, scientist.

So, we say to you, scientists, stop expending so much effort battling perceived threats, like the destruction of a monkey's tree house, and do something useful. Convince the politicians that spraying mosquito nets with DDT is a good idea. Should we choose, we choose malaria stricken Africans over the California Condor, and society should too.

P.S. They don't even have California Condors in Africa.

Definitions

Suicide - the act of killing yourself

Murder - kill intentionally and with premeditation

Given these definitions, there is something odd with this post:

Suicide squad kills 30, wounds 250 in Pakistan

Murder squad is a better headline, anyway.

Bear Attack!

We used to be of the philosophy that we need not be faster than the bear, we only must be faster than the slowest person running from the bear. This story has changed all of that. Imagine doing your best Another Hopkins impression when you are side swiped by a car!



Now, we must be faster than cars?

"A pregnant woman was running from a bear when she darted into the road and was struck by a car, said the Colorado Springs Police Department.

Ashley Swendsen, 26, was struck this afternoon, near the intersection of Woodmen Drive and Vincent Drive on the city's northwest side. The motorist drove off."

And of course the driver fled the scene, there was a fucking bear!

Wikipedia for Spies: The CIA Discovers Web 2.0

Sorry that we have been away for nearly a month, but this story brought us out of hibernation.

Apparently the folks over at Langley are creating, "Intellipedia, a classified version of Wikipedia they say is transforming the way American spy agencies handle top secret information by fostering collaboration across Washington and around the world."


Jimmy Wales, creator of Wikipedia had this to say, "No longer is the shit I thought up the most unreliable source of information on the net."

Forever 21

Good news to all you larger ladies out there, Forever 21, or XXI Forever like the one at Valley Fair is launching a Plus-Sized line.

Here is a photo of one of their plus sized models:

No, wait, that's one of their old girls. So listen up broads, instead of looking like her, you are now able to dress like her. You too, can be Forever 21...size 21.

Imagine no Possessions, or Girl Scouts

The folks over at the San Jose Mercury News (The San Jose Bay Area's finest news source) are telling its readers to "imagine life without Thin Mints, or any Girl Scout cookies for that matter. It's hard because they've become so ingrained in American culture." O rly?

We see no downside to the disappearance of the fabled Thin-Mint. First these fine fellows


have been bringing you Grasshopper cookies all year round.

In fact, we only see upside. No longer will the moms in the office attempt to shake you down for a few boxes and you will not have to walk to the far entrance of Safeway to avoid the squeaky sales pitch from 9 year old girls.

The piece informs the reader that "There are some who think the cookies are an anachronism in the post-feminist era, , and others who use them as a whipping boy (or would that be girl?) in the fight against childhood obesity." Are we living in a post-feminist era? Tell that to the broads over at Feministing.

The author thinks we should buy Girl Scout Cookies because they are American. She thinks that the are uniquely American because "Unlike McDonald's and Coca-Cola, which have become symbols (both positive and negative) of American food as they've multiplied all over the globe, Girl Scout cookies are virtually unknown abroad." That's not American, that's failure. America has successfully exported its culture throughout the world. To say that Girl Scout cookies are unknown outside our shores is to say that they are pretty terrible.

No one thinks of Girl Scouts when they think of America. They think of shitty public schools, crumbling infrastructure, heart disease and assault rifles. If preserving the American culture is so important that the Mercury News would publish this garbage, why do our politicians try so hard to fund our schools, build bridges, provide access to health care and infringe on our second amendment rights?